What Do You Do When You Feel Like You’re Not Good Enough after a Breakup?

When you feel like you're not good enough

Do you still have questions about why the relationship ended?

You may not say it out loud to anyone, but you may be wondering:

  • Was I good enough?
  • Why couldn’t he get it together for me?
  • Why couldn’t the relationship just work?
  • If I were prettier or skinnier or put effort into things would the relationship have worked out?

In reality, I didn’t ask myself directly, “Am I good enough?”, but it was the thought behind my insecurities.

How do you deal with the feeling of not feeling like you’re good enough after a breakup?

If you don’t silence this question, it will continuously play with your self-esteem and self-confidence. This breakup doesn’t determine your worth. Here is how you can remind yourself that you’re good enough.

Remind yourself of who you are

The first step is to remind yourself of who you are and you can do this by pausing and remembering.

Go through old journals, find old yearbooks, read articles you’ve written in the past, remember jobs you’ve had. Go through old photos.

All of these things will help you reconnect with who you were in the past and help you remember who you are.

Another way is to surround yourself with your support system. Find people who’ve known you for a long time and have had lots of experiences with you. They will be able to remind you of who you are. They will laugh and cry with you about old times and help you get in touch with who you are.

This has happened to me before after a traumatic event. I remember feeling lost and disconnected from myself. I called my brother to tell him that I didn’t know who I was anymore, and he said, “I know who you are, and I’ll remind you of who you are when you forget.”

It’s the most beautiful thing in the world to be known and loved, and that’s the gift that reconnecting with your past can give you.

Give yourself the gift of time and perspective

One of the reasons you’re wondering if you’re good enough after this breakup is because you still care and highly value your EX’s opinion.

If you give yourself time and perspective, you’ll find that you care less and less about what your EX has to say about you and his opinion about your value and worth will be unimportant.

You are more than enough

I want to assure you that you are more than enough.  

Just because a relationship is broken, doesn’t mean that you are broken.  Just because someone doesn’t have the eyes to see your worth, it doesn’t take away from your value. 

Your beauty and desirability and worth as a person are not determined by someone else’s appreciation of them but by your realisation of them!

How much value and worth are you giving yourself?  Your value is not attached to what you do, how you look, what hairstyle you’re rocking or how much money is in your bank account.

Your beauty and worth are determined by your inherent value as a human being.

Your contribution to this world isn’t determined by your net worth, but by the way you love and care for those around you.

Stop letting someone else tell you what you’re worth.

Stop letting a failed relationship dictate your value.

You are beautiful. 

You are worthy of love.

You are deserving of good things in life.

You are loved.

Readjust your crown, dust yourself off, and walk like you just won Miss Universe!

Your EX Didn’t give you your value

The most important reason why you should reject the idea that you weren’t good enough for your relationship is that your EX can’t take away what he didn’t give.

No human on this planet can determine your worth as a person. You have value and worth because of who you are. It might take you awhile to remember it, but once you do, you won’t forget it.

You got this!

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